Two Keychains
The Difference a year makes
To be honest I’ve never really thought a lot about time. I’m not one who remembers special dates very well. I feel like it’s a trick question most of the time they ask for my kids date of birth at the doctors office. Shouldn’t they know the answer to that!
But there is one date they I can never forget September 1st. It is the day back in 2003 that Kathryn and I started dating. It was also the day that we got married in 2007.
But things change don’t they? Change is inevitable. The only thing certain in life is change, but the great irony is that most of us don’t like change. Growth and transformation is the journey we are all on… I just keep getting caught off guard by it.
Somethings stay the same like the county fair. But some things change, like these sweet children. They are not the same. They have grown, they have had amazing experiences and their world has been turned upside down. with the loss of their mom.
A lot can change in a year. We went from a family of 6 to a family of 5. I went from being married to widowed.
On September 1, 2007 Kathryn gave a me a small gift on our wedding a simple key chain from our favorite jewelry store in Texas, James Avery. It is the jeweler who made our wedding bands. It’s the place we worked at in college. It has always held a special place in our hearts. The keychain said, “God be with us together and apart.” she had one half and I had the other half. This was a simple reminder that we were husband and wife. I carried it with me across the world. Being married to Kathryn was a gift I didn’t deserve and that reminder we were one was life-giving.
Fast forward to…
September 1, 2023 Kat and I got dressed up, MK took our date night pic and we were out the door headed to favorite steakhouse in Grand Rapids to celebrate our anniversary. 2023 was one of those years with miraculous moments and some dark days. It was the year that were totally surprised with the Birth of Henry Barrett and it was the year that my dad unexpectedly passed away. I remember holding her hand driving my dad’s truck to dinner and we were sharing with each other how we were processing the past year and in the cab of that chevy pick-up God showed up. I just did understanding what it fully meant at the moment.
As we drove up 196 into GR Kat gave me a bag to open. I opened the bag and inside was a silver keychain from James Avery. When I turned the keychain over it said '“Fear Not for I am With you.” Kat said, “Luke When I was in James Avery in August I felt so compelled by God to buy this for you.” As soon as she said it I quickly responded and asked if she was going to die. She laughed and said, “no…. this past year as been hard with loss of your dad and I just know that this truth is what God wants to keep in front of you.”
Little did we know that 7 months later Kat would pass away from cancer. On September 1, 2023 God spoke through my wife to prepare me for the road that was ahead. 17 years ago Kathryn and I made vows to love each in sickness and health until death do us part. 4 and half months ago those promises were kept and now those promises are complete.
A lot can change in a year…. I’ve changed a lot in the last year. I’ve been scarred by death. The tears get stuck in my throat. I’ve laughed, I’ve cried. I’ve seen the hand of God carry my family. I have more questions than answers, where I felt confident before I have doubts, but the overwhelming truth is that God has been with us together and apart and He still is. God is with Kathryn and she is with Him and two silvery keychains remind me that He is with me.
Grace & Peace,
Luke
Luke, I prayed over your broken heart when I finished this post. You have a way of making me cry, whether it’s in your blog or when you are preaching. It’s because you are always transparent, and so passionate about our Jesus.
This life is hard! I hardly knew Kathryn and yet I miss her so much! Seeing your precious children growing up without her presence is heartbreaking. But yet….God is so close and ever present in our pain. 7.5 years post losing my sweet husband, I’ve experienced His nearness, loving presence of others that He’s provided, financial security, a new church home 😊 the list goes on. I WOULD NOT have seen beauty from ashes if I didn’t believe in Him. I used to long to be in heaven with my husband, now I long to be in heaven with Jesus! He is my husband, the best kind on earth. I continue to pray for you, and thank you for these posts. ❤️
My dear brother, I will continue to pray for you as you travel through uncharted waters! You are not alone, and answers will come in time!
Love you my friend!